The 'R' word

Redundancy.

It's a horrible word, almost as bad as a swear word but definitely more widely used.

It hasn't affected us until now, we were so thankful that we both still had jobs despite the recession and all the problems both our places of work were experiencing but now we've both been made redundant from both of our works, and our last days are coincidentally the same.

Dunno how I feel about my own redundancy just yet even though I was expecting it and it had plenty of time to sink in but I guess I was just trying to ignore it and hope that something would happen so that nothing would change.

My hubbie is dealing very well with his own redundancy, he's thrown himself into the job search and is enjoying the extra time he now has with his daughters as he feels like he's missed out on so much.

Maybe for me it'll mean a chance to rethink the stay-at-home-mummy plan for a wee while because we can't afford childcare for both our twins and I wouldn't be able to search for part-time work that would suit our situation as it was before the 'R' word interfered.

Something will come up, it always does and there's no point in dwelling on it. It just means for a little while that anything considered a luxury will be scaled down on but as long as our daughters bums are covered and their tummies are full that's all that matters.

Redundancy

Hubbie was made redundant on Monday, we were expecting it and he's ok with it but I'm not. I'm not sure what to make of it all. Yes he's getting a redundancy package from his employers and yes the Citizen's Advice have given him some brilliant advice about what to do now, especially as I only work 16 hours a week so they've given Hubbie a list of everyone we both need to notify about the change in our circumstances and all of that but despite everything being very straightforward at the moment I'm still very overwhelmed by it all.

I suppose if we didn't have our twins I wouldn't be feeling like this but I'm scared we might not be able to provide for them as we have been doing, I don't want to have to rely on a higher rate of child tax credits or working tax credits and Hubbie's job seekers allowance to get us through each month, I don't want to have to rely more on family members even though they'll all be willing to help out it's just something that completely goes against the grain for me.

Do I blame my upbringing for my feelings or is it something I've decided upon as I went out into the world of work and becoming independent?

Neither of my Parents have ever relied on anything other than their wages, they never received any benefits etc and only got the usual child allowance for the three of us and despite the fact my Father is classed as disabled because of his diabetes this was something he never claimed on until he was told he had to. When you're raised in a family who never had to rely on government support it's hard to accept that you yourself may have to to keep your family going.